MOUSSAKA

I first heard about Moussaka as I was skyping my close friend who had recently moved to Bulgaria: “image a shepherd’s pie that’s been marinated in wine and lined with crispy potatoes.” My imagination went wild as I tried to envision how such complex flavors could possibly all interact in one dish.

 

When it came time to attempt my own Bulgarian cooking, there was only one thing on my mind: Moussaka. However, when it came to finding an authentic recipe, I had a much more difficult time than originally anticipated. I decided upon the following recipe due to its high rating, and I was not disappointed in the way my glorious Moussaka turned out. This being said, I hope this blog post will be helpful by pointing out the flaws in the recipe so your Moussaka will be better than ever. With its hearty meat and fresh vegetables, no dish encompasses the spirit of the Balkans as well as Bulgarian Moussaka.

 

To begin,

You will need these pretty ingredients:

These less pretty ingredients:

And the slightly less photogenic, but still beautiful at heart, ground beef.

Now, before we begin, I must admit one thing: I am a microwave chef. As a college student, my time is spent everywhere but the kitchen. I knew that when I read the recipe and it said cook time was an hour, I would need to allow at least triple that time for me. (Spoiler alert: I was right.)

However, I’m not quite convinced that my stretched time schedule was all my fault. At a few points in the recipe I followed I found myself questioning if I should actually do what it told me. For the sake of discovery I did, but then wound up regretting it. In this post I will outline exactly what to do to ensure that you don’t spend three plus hours in the kitchen as well. These declassified tips and tricks will have your moussaka tasting better than ever while not sacrificing the entirety of your afternoon. But even if it does take you the whole afternoon, I can promise you it’ll be worth it. It was unlike anything I had ever eaten before. Just look how happy we are.

*Note: this blog will be written from the perspective of a person who has no cooking experience. It is meant to help my fellow novices, and will therefore go into details that the experienced chef might find commonsense. So if you already know what “finely chopped” means, you can peruse on by. But I had to google it, so I’m going to talk about it.

Alright, time to begin. Which means it’s time to talk about my first mistake. The recipe says “Heat 2 tbsp of olive oil in a saucepan. Add the ground beef, the onion, the tomatoes, salt, black paper, oregano.” After scoffing at the neglection of a conjunction and the misspelling of “pepper,” I was punished for my judgement of the recipe’s grammar by heating the olive oil and then realized I had yet to chop my vegetables.

So the real first thing you need to do chop everything. I recommend chopping your onion last so that way you can take a few minutes to regain your eyesight as your veggies simmer. So start with cutting your tomatoes. The recipe says to slice them, but I took creative liberties and chopped them. In my mind it made more sense to add chopped tomatoes to ground beef than sliced tomatoes. It also said to peel the tomatoes, but I imagined a peeled tomato to look like a peeled grape, and I thought that was weird so I didn’t do it. In addition, I hope that you have more than one knife in your kitchen, because I only have one dull serrated steak knife, and it was not the idea tool for the job. It kind of just shredded everything.  After you have a chopped tomato mosh, finely chop your onions. Now according to google, “finely chop” is the midpoint between “chop” and “mince.” But don’t get too excited. Finely chopping onions will take you approximately one sixth of your life. It will also cost you your eyesight.

Alright, so now that you have you stuff chopped, you can actually heat your olive oil. I was going to just throw the beef and veggies in at the same time, but luckily my friend told me I should let the onions simmer for a bit and brown a little before adding the tomatoes. Apparently this adds more flavor, which is something I like, so I did it. I then touched raw meat for the first time in my life and added the ground beef. Now take a spatula or anything you can use to poke things and mash everything up. At this point you can also add as much oregano, salt, and pepper as you like. I added a lot because it came out faster than I expected.

Okay, next step. After everything is mushed and your beef is beginning to brown, you can turn your heat down and cover it. I didn’t have a lid for my pan, so I used a cookie sheet. As this simmers on low, make sure to stir it occasionally. The recipe says to simmer it until the liquids evaporate, but that was taking forever, so I drained it by dumping it all out onto a plate that I had put a paper towel on.

 

Alright, now it’s time to preheat the oven to 375. While it’s heating up, you use that time to peel your potatoes. If you don’t have a potato peeler, go to the store and buy one. It’s not worth trying to do it with a knife– trust me. After you peel the potatoes, it’s time to get to slicing. The recipe didn’t say how thick, so I cut mine about the width of half a pinky fingernail. Like this:

Now you can set your potatoes to the side and make your wine mixture. All you do is take a half a cup of the cheapest pinot grigio you can find, and combine it with a half a cup of water. Done.

By this time your oven should be preheated, so it’s time for the exciting part: the assembly. Grab a square baking pan (I used an 8 x 8 because the recipe didn’t specify) and cover the bottom with potato slices, overlapping them ever so slightly. The recipe says to use two full potatoes to cover the bottom, but that was way too much for me. Just use as much as you need to create one solid layer. Once you’ve got that done, sprinkle a little salt and pepper on them.

Now it’s time to add your beef, onion, and tomato mixture. Although I used more beef than the recipe called for (it called for half a pound, and I used a pound and a quarter), I still had a hard time covering the entire row of potatoes with the mixture. So I would definitely recommend going heavy handed on the beef to ensure your dinner party gets a hearty dose of protein.

After this is done you can add another layer of potatoes like you did to the bottom of the pan. Again, this will not take two whole potatoes.

The recipe says to sprinkle more salt, pepper, and oregano onto this layer, but I would wait until after you pour the wine mixture in because when I did that it washed the seasoning off. So go ahead and pour your wine mixture into your pan. The recipe says that the wine should almost cover the last layer of potatoes, and mine did not at all, so I decided to add a little more wine and water until it was almost covered. I believe this is where I went wrong. Do not do this. Just add what the recipe calls for and move along your happy way. Just don’t forget to add more salt, pepper, and oregano.

Hooray, it’s baking time. Now the recipe says “bake about 45 minutes or until the liquid is evaporated,” but 45 minutes rolled around an I still had alcoholic beef and potato soup on my hands, so I put it in for another 15 minutes. And then another 15. And another. And another. In order to prevent me losing my mind, I took out my pan, dumped out the wine and water, and popped it back in for another 5 minutes for good measure.

Now while it’s baking, you can use this time to clean your kitchen. Pro tip: clean it while you’re cooking so you can enjoy your creation without having a dirty kitchen looming in your mind. After you clean the kitchen, you can make your egg mixture. Combine your eggs, milk, and flour in a mixing bowl and beat it till your forearms scream. Now add some salt, pepper, oregano, and parsley. Because we haven’t done that enough already.

Okay hallelujah, your three hours are almost up. Once your wine mixture has evaporated (or you got impatient and dumped it out) take your your pan and pour this creamy egg mixture over the entire thing.

The recipe says to put it back in the oven for five minutes, but my egg was still gooey after five minutes and I ended up baking mine for another 20 total. You want the top to be crispy and a beautiful golden brown, and you will definitely have to exercise patience to get it there. Think something along the lines of a quiche. When you take it out, it should look like this:

 

And now the moment we all have been waiting for… you’re done! Slice it up and serve it with a bit of fresh parsley to make it look fancy. After all, if you made it this far you deserve some eye candy.

I’m not going to lie, I was extremely surprised at how well this turned out for me. The crispiness of the potatoes when combined with the fluffiness of the egg and beef was a wonderful combination. The pinot grigio, despite its inexpensive price tag, gave the dish a wonderfully complex flavor. It was a huge hit with my dinner party, and it even inspired me to maybe give cooking another shot.

Enjoy!

*Note: it says it serves four, but that is a lie. I doubled the recipe and my roommate and I shared one pan and my boyfriend ate the other all by himself. It realistically serves two. Or maybe it’s just so scrumptious that no one had the willpower to stop eating after one serving. Regardless, I recommend at least doubling the recipe because in the very least you will have the best leftovers of your life for the next day or two.

 

**Special thanks to my friend and my wonderful roommate for their thorough support through all three hours of this. I couldn’t have done it without you guys.